Monday, November 8, 2010


Somedays, sometimes.. I just don't know which way is up and which way is down. So tired, overwhelmed. But even in the darkness there are always these little islands of light. Things I should and AM greatful for. I just feel like I am being pulled in two directions and not sure how to feel. Like crying and and feeling blessed. I believe I am somewhat in the grips of PMS also at the moment which may also be adding to the colors on the palette. There isn't just "black and white" but all these varying shades of grey. I am cold, and my entire body hurts. And a little sick of myself.... Sick of thinking to much.... not ever DOING enough. Sick of waiting, sick of being scared, sick of being hurt, Sick of feeling stuck. One thing after another... So very tired. I don't remember signing on for "Intensive Life Studies 101". I need to speak to the guidance counselor about changing my course studies to "Lucky Bastard, And "Easy Street". I am told that there are amazing oppurtunities for those who don't flunk out of this course.... But the "flunk out" rate is still pretty high. Somedays.... I'm just not sure I want to "stay the course"... :/ ;p :(


  1. i love the way you word everything !! it all is just spoken so honest and beautiful! i love it !

  2. Hang in there and when shit gets bad, look at the humor in it. It's usually there is you look closely.