I slept "last night" from about 8 o'clock pm to 2 thirty am. So of course it is fifteen to five in the morning and I'm awake. My sleep cycles are so completely SCREWED! Well,.. I don't work today. yay. Actually I kinda wish I did.. I am starting to feel a little "money anxiety" burning up in my gut. my "darling" boyfriend has changed our daughters karate classes to one that is a little more expensive. Only (ONLY) six more dollars a month. So thats a grand total of one-hundred & six-teen dollars a month. Plus she needed a NEW fifty dollar uniform. *sigh*... I'm not exactly upset about THAT... I love the confidence it gives her , she is so happy. And I have to admit it makes me gloat that I have the ability to raise happy healthy children where as and despite the fact that my mother........... welll, couldn't? But I feel spread pretty thin... and I am generally the one that has to worry about not ending up on the street. If it wasn't for the children... I don't believe I would stress any where near as much.. I wouldn't care... if I did end up on the street... Lets just call it... an adventure. Yeah! But with a baby and two little ones... I can't exactly justify letting it all go... although I do sometimes fantasize about just going "straight hippy" finding some commune where we just grow are own vegetables............ lol. Sounds so... soothing.
~M
Life is such a struggle for you Venus Flower. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better. So glad you had a good sleep last night!
ReplyDeleteVenus Flower, I raised 3 kids pretty much on my own and I can relate to your post. Money was always tight, despite me working 10 hour days and sometimes, two jobs and there was never enough money so I know of what you speak.
ReplyDeleteI used to wake up with anxiety just thinking how I and I alone was responsible for these 3 little souls. It's scary stuff. You'll get through it. I am so pleased at the lessons I taught my kids and because of our hard times, they appreciate so much.
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